Plethora of Felicity
by Ria Lee
Summary: A stronghold for all Gakuen Alice one-shots and snippets.
1. Ironic

**A/N: Just so you'd understand what this is, this place will be a stronghold for all random Gakuen Alice fics that aren't part of any challenges or anything at all. These are one-shots that, when separated, might make my profile a little bit messier than it should be. These are not connected at all. About the title, plethora and felicity are two beautiful words, that, when placed side by side, may create a wonderful feeling to anyone, hence the title.**

**Everything in this place - from this point onward - shall be disclaimed. All recognizable characters, icons and whatnot are not mine, but the plot is. **

**This one-shot is dedicated to Revolutionary Pen.**

**Expect moderate/high OOC.**

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><p><strong>Ironic<strong>

"_I __thought __I __am __through __with __my __ironic __life, __but __only __now __that __I __realized __it's __just __about __to __start,"_

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><p>Hello, I am Shouda Sumire, and I am living an ironic life.<p>

Everyone sees me as the _slutty __gold-digger_ or the _stupid __friendship-breaker_, but all those hearsays are not true, not at all. I don't understand how or why they spread those rumours, but other than that, I couldn't care less. After all, what matters most would be the truth and what my friends know; and by friends I meant the two girls I've always wanted to know deeper, Sakura Mikan and Imai Hotaru.

How I became their friend—that I do not know as well. It just sort of happened all of a sudden, and then and there we became friends. It's amazing how much they've shown me a side of life I never thought existed; I know I've done so many mean things to them before, but despite the fact that I did, they still managed to give me a second chance and embraced me for who I am.

People try to spread rumours that I just used them to be near Natsume-kun and Ruka-kun, but they never listen to them. They'd pat me on the back, saying, _"Don't __worry, __Perms! __We __won't __listen __to __them, __we're __friends, __remember?"_well, Mikan does, but I know Hotaru surely feels that way too. She's a mysterious girl, but I know that beneath her cold demeanour is a heart willing to be there.

It's such a shame that I have to hide a secret from them; a secret known to many but not to them. Somehow, I feel like I am betraying them, with all the things I can't seem to say. If only there's a way to express it, I would most definitely do so; but I know it will hurt them, it will hurt _her._

Contrary to what most people say, I don't fancy Natsume at all. I love Nogi Ruka, and I know Hotaru loves him as much as I do; only that she keeps it as passive as possible. I don't want them to know, of course, but all secrets will always be spilled.

If not now, I don't know when.

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><p>"Class, you will have a paired assignment to be passed next week, Valentine's Day about the <em>different <em>_types __of __love __and __how __it __affects __people_; you have to compile it in a scrapbook. Also, your seatmate will be your partner. Adieu!" the roses faded as Narumi-sensei ended his talk and dismissed the class as he pranced away, leaving them to discuss the homework given. Sumire huffed as she noticed that she doesn't have a partner _yet __again_, as Wakako already transferred to the high school division, leaving her all alone in her seat. She let her eyes roam around the room, feeling slightly insecure of the fact that almost everyone already has a partner, while she's stuck behind the classroom, contemplating on the matter at hand—until she felt a quick tap on her shoulder, and, assuming it was Koko and his pranks again, she ranted before swiftly turning and facing him pointedly, arms akimbo.

"I told you not to—oh, it's you, Ruka," she reddened with embarrassment as she realized that it was the person she least expected to tap her. Ruka smiled as he slightly massaged his neck to avoid the awkward air. He then cleared his throat and sat beside Sumire, the latter still red in the face.

"I'm your partner, you see. Cause Natsume's got Mikan, so…" Ruka gestured to them and faced her, his azure eyes twinkling with amusement as he just witnessed the two bicker _again_. Sumire smiled and nodded in apprehension as she wrote the things to be done in a notepad.

"What do you say we start the assignment tonight?" she asked, slightly aware of Hotaru giving them a wary, clandestine glance.

"I'd love to, but I have some appointments in the Central Town that I have to deal with. So, if it'd be alright, tomorrow?" Ruka offered with an apologetic aura, only to have Sumire tap him on the shoulder in a light manner and laughed a mellifluous one.

"It's perfectly alright! Plus, I have to go buy some materials for our scrapbook so I'll have to go to Central Town too. Can I come?" Sumire asked, putting her things on her sling and standing up as she did so.

"Of course! We could shop for it together since, for all we know, you could choose girly things that doesn't suit me at all," he snickered as she puffed her cheeks and elbowed him lightly as they went out of the room together—Central Town and their project in mind.

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><p>Hotaru's eyes narrowed into mauve slits as she witnessed the scene unfold before her. She gathered her belongings and left the room in a breeze, leaving Kitsuneme to work on the first phase of their assignment without even knowing where she was about to go.<p>

"Hotaru! Let's go to Central Town!" Mikan hugged Hotaru's right arm as she swiftly passed and went to the direction of the bus stop. Hotaru had a faraway look—something very uncharacteristic of her—and just nodded without stopping her mini-trek.

'_I __knew __I __could __not __trust __that __seaweed __girl __from __the __start.'_

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><p>Nogi Ruka has changed a lot these past six years; he's not the usual gay-ish sort of blondie as what Hotaru forces him to be anymore. He doesn't have his hair down anymore, as he styles it in a messy kind of way that is so much different to Natsume's, but still makes him look hotter than any other guy in the Academy. His azure eyes have appeared brighter, making it look sky blue-ish in color. His body became leaner, and is maintaining that shape. He gained himself more fans, particularly because of these aspects—too bad he only has one girl in mind.<p>

The two entered the bus and quickly looked for seats as they continued conversing about Koko and Kitsuneme. Ruka's laugh tinkled as Sumire told him about the time when Mr. Bear knocked off Koko with a punch when he ran off to the Northern Woods because he was so scared of the enchanted Valentine's Day chocolate given by Tsubasa last year. The blond then regained his sane state as he took a deep breath.

"Koko really is a funny one, don't you think?" he was still out of breath when he asked, and Sumire just had to suppress a smile for that.

"Yes, he is. Except that he always ruins my day with his crazy antics along with Kitsu. They freak me out," she said, suddenly somber in nature. Ruka faced her and smiled a genuine one.

"It's okay. You always look like you're having so much fun with them. If I hadn't known enough, I would think of you and Koko as two people with mutual affection for each other," he then winked and turned away, only to be surprised by a pair of chocolate orbs and another of amethyst ones looking at them with question.

"Mikan, Hotaru!" Sumire stared at them in shock. Who knew they were sitting in front of them all along? _I __must __be __too __caught __up __with __Ruka __beside __me, _she thought.

"Where are you about to go, Sumire?" Mikan beamed at them with her usual smile, whilst Hotaru slightly tipped her head to recognize them.

"We're supposed to go to Central Town and buy the things needed for our scrapbook; how about you?" Sumire replied and settled back on her seat as she watched the Academy grounds move before her, feeling the childlike joy of the wind flipping her hair in a swift motion. Ruka watched her with amusement written on his face. It was his first time hanging out with Sumire, and he never thought she was _this_ fun to be with.

What they don't know is that a pair of narrowed slits have been silently watching them this whole time.

"I'm about to go grab some Fluff Puffs to save me a heapload of energy for Natsume later," seeing that the three gave her a really weird glance, Mikan then interjected briskly, "No! That's not what I'm talking about! Let me rephrase it then; I need to have energy so I could do my assignment with the demon himself later, and God knows how much energy I need to go fetch his arse from the blasted tree, explain the whole concept of love to him, then deal with his irky, cantankerous nature for the whole week—"

"Okay, Mikan. We get it, now stop rambling or I'll throw you off the next bus stop," Hotaru cut her mid-sentence with her deadly monotonous drawl. The former then slumped to her seat as she fed her eyes with sceneries that only Gakuen Alice could provide. Hotaru faced the two and tipped her head again.

"We'll see you later," she closed their conversation as the bus skidded to a halt.

* * *

><p>"I'm home!" Sumire declared loudly, causing two girls too look up from what they're doing; Hotaru, watching Shopping Channel and Mikan with her Fluff Puffs.<p>

"I thought you went to Natsume?" Sumire inquired as she placed her food package on the countertop, eyeing Mikan with her emerald orbs.

"Nah, that git's too busy reading manga to even realize we have a project to do," she mused and quickly shrugged the thought off her system as she propped another Howalon in her mouth. Sumire then stood up and rummaged through her shopping bag as she unearthed her personal belongings.

"Did you have the materials ready for the scrapbook?" Mikan continued as she leaned on the kitchen door, Howalon box in hand and a glass of water in the other.

"Yep, it's a shame Ruka had to go choose some of the designs; he figured we could have the gender-equality thing as our scrapbooking motifs. Self-explanatory, that is," she then showed them the designs, and Hotaru just had to express her utter impression on how well he chose the materials—something which slightly irked Sumire.

"Lucky you. I don't know what mistake I made in my past life that threw me in my current situation of having an arrogant brat as a partner. Anyway, was that the reason why he had to accompany you to Central Town, then?" Mikan openly interrogated her again, settling herself on a plushy chair next to Hotaru and asking her to change the channel to Cartoons.

"Not really, he told me that was one of the reasons why, but he mentioned about an appointment that he had to deal with. He even excused himself in the middle of our perusal and went to a flower shop on the next street," she then dreamily sighed, gazing at the ceiling and enjoying the memories that succeeded the situation.

"I take it you like him then?" Hotaru changed the channel into the movies as she turned around.

"N-No! What makes you say that?" Sumire kept her hands busy by sorting the materials and avoided Hotaru's eye.

"C'mon Hotaru! I'm sure Sumi's over the Natsume and Ruka fan club thing now! It's been six years since!" Mikan pointed out as she tried to get the remote control from Hotaru. The latter then huffed indignantly and turned back to watching TiVo, whacking Mikan's hand as she was about to change the channel.

'_I'm __really __sorry, __Hotaru,_'

* * *

><p>"Wow, you're early!" Ruka commented as Sumire stepped shyly inside his quarters. His room was so much alike to theirs, only that it was designed in a manly fashion. Then, taking time in looking at the ornaments before her, she noticed that he was alone in his room—the thought of it made her nervous.<p>

"W-Where's Natsume?" she inquired as she was busy laying down the materials on his desk. Ruka then got his laptop and lied on his stomach as he began typing out.

"He's out on a mission," he remarked.

"I thought he already stopped doing so?" Sumire sat on the bed as she watched Ruka search for their assignment.

"I thought so too, turns out, Persona just had to force him again. By the way, here's what I found last night, I think this would help," Ruka showed her the site and Sumire nodded.

"Yeah, I think it's cool. I don't get why Naru wants us to make this stupid discussion of love as his assignment though. _It's __not __like __we're __gonna __use __it __in __the __near __future_," she stomped in a childlike manner and proceeded to design the scrapbook while Ruka snickered as he printed out documents.

"Who knows?" he muttered.

* * *

><p>"Would you believe it? Tomorrow's our last day of making this stupid homework and we're almost done! We should just slow down a bit," Sumire laughed as she was cutting pieces of paper in a shape of a heart and pasted it on the scrapbook.<p>

"Of course! We're awesome like that. Now that you mentioned it, we should actually talk about our lives while making this," he offered and sat down opposite her as he helped cutting out stuff.

"W-Well, I suppose," she stuttered, afraid of him digging up her long-buried history. He then started by spilling stuff about him that only a few people know about—silently urging her to do her part of the talk too. When she finally had the confidence, they conversed smoothly while keeping their hands busy by designing the scrapbook they made. They began talking about so many things that makes Sumire wonder if Ruka reciprocates her feelings too.

"So, tell me about your friends," Ruka propped his chin up as he looked at Sumire directly in the eye, causing her to involuntarily shift her eyes to avoid his.

"They're wonderful people, Mikan and Hotaru. They've been there through all the good and bad times, they never left me hanging and they always support me in everything I do despite the things I did to them years ago," she said, losing the nervousness she's been keeping for the time being.

Ruka nodded as though he seemed to understand, "They have someone special in their lives, I assume? Cause naturally Natsume would've courted Mikan in all passivity already, and Hotaru—err—Imai, she likes someone too, right?"

Sumire pondered on that query. How did Ruka become so inclined to her friends' relationships all of a sudden? There has to be some legitimate reason for the peculiar behaviour he's been showcasing. It's either Natsume asked him about Mikan and just dragged Hotaru along to avoid the hidden message _or_ he was interested in Hotaru and just dragged Mikan along to avoid the hidden motive. That alone made her emerald orbs narrow in slits.

"I don't know about that, honestly speaking. We've not talked about each other's love lives before, so I don't have an idea how they're going with it. Your assumption is right, maybe, but you could ask them if you like, if you are so keen to know," she replied rather smoothly, silently applauding herself for the lies she just did in front of him. Ruka, on the other hand, looked like he was having a mental battle on whether or not he should actually ask them for real, something Sumire thought was funny.

"Meh, I don't think I could do that, can I? Besides, I already have my heart reserved for someone special, you see," but Sumire wasn't listening to him. She was busy reading a part of the print-out she just pasted.

"_**Why ****do ****people ****fal****l ****in ****love?**_

_No one exactly knows how one person falls in love. It's a very magical feeling that could sweep you off your feet or could probably end your life if you let it. It doesn't need to be explained at all because if you feel it, you'll always know._

_**How do you know if you're in love?**_

_This is one of the hardest questions to answer because you can't explain if you love someone. There are many ways a person can love someone else and it's hard to understand. When you love someone, you basically can't live without them. It's the things you feel when you're with the person, as if you can't help but smile just by looking at them. It's the way your stomach tingles when you're close to them/with them. It's the way how you feel, like you need to see them everyday. How seeing them makes you extremely happy. It's how you miss them 5 minutes after they left. It's when you sacrifice something for someone with no pity but with your own will. You'll know if it's true love when you're hurt when he/she's hurt and you're sad when he/she's sad. They're really important to you, don't ever want them to get hurt or leave. When you're in love, you'll know. There is no possible way to describe how love works. It's kind of like the way you love your family, but in a different way but trust me, as stated above, once you're in love, you'll know._

Sumire stifled a smile as she reminisced the time when she realized it was Ruka who made her heart beat wildly like never before. She then read on, not noticing Rukas feeble attempt at catching her attention.

_However, behind all those romantic smiles of celebrated couples, there will always be that one person who suffers by the sidelines. You need not elaborate on how this feels because it is a heart-wrenching one. You couldn't simply fathom how everything is not turning out the way it is, but you try, because you know there's still hope._

_What you need to do? You have no choice but to get over this person. You must let them go and you have to move on. What you need to realize is that you can and will love someone again and they will love you in return. Life is a risk and it has to be that way otherwise there would be no adventure to it. Also to know love, you also need to know pain. The passage of time will help to heal your wounds, but it won't completely erase them. Your life is a journey that will be difficult at times, but stay on the path because you never know what is just around the corner. Remember that you control your own mind and it's your own choice if you want to keep thinking about the past or look to the future. Don't worry about making mistakes; it's the only way you can learn. Also true love involves a lot of hard work, nobody is perfect."_

'_No,'_Sumire thought, _'Ruka __loves __me, __he __might __not __tell __me __that, __but __I __know __he __does,'_

'_How __sure __can __you __be?'_a voice at the back of her mind asked.

'_Well, __not __that __much; __but __I __know __he __does!'_she replied, still immovable from her belief.

'_You __could __always __ask __him, __tomorrow, __later, _right now_…__' _the voice mocked her as she tried to think.

'_Tomorrow __it __is __then. __I'll __tell __him __everything __about __how __I __feel, __and __he'll __tell __me __he __loves __me __too. __You'll __see__…__'_

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><p>"Yoshi! We're done! What do you say we buy ourselves some drinks outside first?" Sumire was far too happy to even remember the deal she made with herself. Ruka smiled as they went out of his room and took a stroll outside.<p>

Sumire suddenly remembered about the deal and stopped walking, earning a strange look from Ruka.

"Listen, Ruka-" she started, but she couldn't find the will to continue.

It was as nervous as when you introduce yourself to a bunch of strangers; that butterflies-in-your-tummy kind of feeling because you don't know what the other person might say. Sumire waited for a while, silently praying that he wouldn't freak out and just leave her there.

"Truth is, I have something to say to you," he interjected after a minute of silence, and Sumire tried so hard not to jump in happiness because of a little spark of hope inside of her, telling her that _maybe,_just maybe, he likes her too.

"You know its Valentine's Day tomorrow, right?" Ruka started, seeing her silence as an invitation for him to continue.

"Y-Yes, why?" Sumire asked, suddenly feeling giddy with the plethora of emotions surrounding her at the moment.

"I'm gonna say something to you, make sure you remember every word I say, alright?" he winked at her, successfully melting her insides. She just nodded to restrain herself.

"**I ****love ****you ****so ****much; ****you're ****the ****best ****thing ****that's ****ever ****happened ****to ****me. ****I ****don't ****care ****if ****you ****just ****think ****of ****me ****as ****a ****friend, ****but ****all ****I ****know ****is ****that ****I ****love ****you, ****and ****I ****will ****always ****be ****here ****when ****you ****need ****me**,"

Sumire was speechless, as if this was a dream come true. She opened her mouth and closed it like a fish out of water. Ruka smiled to her, as if feeling her happiness.

"Do you remember everything I said?" he asked, leaning on the wall as he did so.

"O-Of course," was all that she said, as she couldn't bring herself to understand that Ruka likes her too.

But then as she opened her mouth to say something, Ruka interjected without knowing.

"Could you please say that to Hotaru for me? I couldn't bring myself to say that in front of her without stuttering, you see," he said, and started to walk back to his quarters. He then turned back and smiled at her.

"Thanks for helping me practice that speech, by the way. I'll be indebted to you," he then winked and walked away.

"Wait," Sumire muttered; head held low as the truth slowly sank in.

"Yeah?" Ruka called back.

"You can count on me!" she then turned to him and did a Mikan-ish thumbs up. Ruka smiled a genuine one before walking back to her and kissed her cheek.

"Thank you so much, Sumire. That means so much," he said and walked away for real, leaving her to weep with his dust.

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><p>"Thank you for that, Sumire. I'm sorry for all the misinterpretation; I never thought you helped Ruka and I to get together," was Hotaru's note for me that early morning on the day of St. Valentine. I tried not to cry once more, keeping in mind that I actually helped my buds attain happiness and that, alone, is already enough.<p>

I thought I am through with my ironic life, but only now that I realized it's just about to start.

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><p><em>Reedited and revised for any misinterpretations and stupid typographicalgrammatical errors, 102711._

_Reviews?_

_Ria x_


	2. A Sordid Queen's Selfless Love

It's so good to be back.

Anyway, as I was busy rummaging through my unfinished stories which have been gathering dust in my folders, I found this one-shot and I just thought of, well, finishing it and sharing it with you guys. This thing features a whole lot of OOC, a lot of cussing, and weird pairings so, please, be warned.

My deepest gratitude to **Ate Ghing **(**kidaokagee**) for letting me borrow her really awesome original poem.

**EzMouse** / Nikki Poo, this one's for you. :3 Though this wasn't the one I originally planned because the first one got wiped off the face of the Earth and could never be retrieved again.

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><p><strong>A Sordid Queen's Selfless Love<strong>

"_It's not easy to forget, not easy to throw away what you feel nor is it easy to love someone so fast; because if you really love someone, no matter what you do, you'll still remember him."_

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><p><strong>I'M SURE YOU KNOW WHAT THIS IS.<strong>

**YES, THIS IS A FREAKING COVER PAGE OF A DIARY OR WHATEVER YOU CALL A NOTEBOOK WHERE YOU WRITE IMPORTANT EVENTS IN YOUR LIFE. **

**YOU'RE NOT SUPPOSED TO READ THE CONTENTS OF THIS THING, BUT SINCE YOU PAID ME YOUR SCHOOL YEAR'S WORTH OF ALLOWANCE…**

**HERE YOU GO.**

**MY NAME? IMAI HOTARU**

**WHAT I DO FOR A LIVING? DRAIN MONEY FROM PEOPLE'S POCKETS**

**MY AGE? SOMEWHERE BETWEEN 15 and 16—STOP GIVING ME A WILD GUESS**

**FAVORITE PERSON? SOMEONE WHO'S NAME IS IMAI HOTARU**

_**HOW TO MAKE ME LOVE YOU? GIVE ****ME A LIFETIME SUPPLY OF CRABS AND WE CAN TALK ABOUT THE MARRIAGE LATER ON**_

**FOOD I EAT? CRABS**

**WHAT I LOVE? CRABS**

**ANYTHING APPEALING? CRABS**

**DECAPOD CRUSTACEAN? CRABS**

**LIOCARCINUS VERNALIS? CRABS**

**CRABS? YES**

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><p><em><strong>May 15, 2010<strong>_

I fall in love rarely, but when I do fall in love, I fall real hard.

This isn't one of those oh-googly-moogly-I-suddenly-like-this-awesome-boy-and-oh-my-he-likes-me-too-and-now-we're-going-out-forever-and-have-kids kind of drama. Those stupid overused stories you have in mind for me should be buried already, as those things do not apply in my situation at all. It might be that this situation already happened to at least one person in a billion possibilities, because as you all dunderheads know, we are living in such vast planet with seven to eight billion people living and arguing and fighting and sleeping and dying every single day—and that fact alone already makes this pathetic excuse of a diary entry a cliché one. Another theory for me to think that this not-so-cliché story is actually a cliché one is because of the fact that almost every story crafted in this planet have been inspired by another story and another and another…you could consider it an endless argument of another's.

Who cares about that?

That's not what you came here for. You didn't read this entry to be confused; you read this to understand—although I don't see any reason for you to understand my demise because you won't gain anything from this anyway, except if you have any hidden motives like selling my story online or posting it somewhere without my permission and gaining money from it. You can't do that. You just can't. This story can never be copied nor pasted—because what would you paste if you can't even copy a single word, right?

You think I don't make sense?

Well, bad news, you're wrong. I am Imai Hotaru, after all.

I always make sense, even if you think I don't.

Who cares about what you think? This is my diary, and what I say is the law.

Rule one: I am **always **right.

Rule two: Obey before you complain. If I tell you to pose with your favourite pyjamas in the shower, go pose first before you eat me alive—if you can. Heh.

Rule three: If you think I'm wrong, refer to rule one. If you still think I'm wrong after reading the first rule, then you are asking for your death.

Capisce?

* * *

><p><em>July 8, 2008<em>

I've known him since I was five. He was my neighbour back when we were still toddlers, but it seems like when we reached the Academy, he suddenly changed and immediately forgot about me. We used to do so many things together; we'd always have fun and all that. He would open up to me whenever his father abuses his little sister, and I help him find ways to survive his father's cruelty. People say we had so many things in common, as he was just as nonchalant as I appeared to be. Well, I can honestly say that I **do **look at bit too unconcerned with all the global happenings—but seriously; I have been hiding a part of myself from everyone, too. Just like him, I profusely hide my true self by putting up a mask.

Why do I know that, you ask?

Simply because I was his best friend before all these crapola happened.

I fell in love with him when I was ten—but of course I will never _ever_, in my entire life, would dare tell that to anyone. From the duration of our stay in this Academy, he has changed so much that sometimes, I doubt myself if this was really the kid I grew up with. He became too snobbish even I can't get near him anymore, he always hangs out with his new bunny boy friend, he takes a nap on a Sakura tree and his raven hair became messier. He has that monotonous voice and he is also intelligent—_really _intelligent. He was always at the top of our class even though he only shows up once a week or twice a month for that matter—something very different from the '_him__'_ I've known for years. He gets irritable every time someone disturbs his nap, meddles with his business, or if someone steals his personal space. His eye colour is crimson—a strong, deep red bloodlike colour—and his favorite fruit is strawberry.

Not only was he a good model for my future photography skits, but he was also a wonderful sight to behold. He may always exude a mysterious aura to match his get-near-me-or-die attitude, but I want to be near him again, just like the old days. I don't plan on making him like me as well; I just want him to know that I still exist—his first best friend is still willing to help him get through the claws of life. I want him to know there is more to this world than darkness and all those sullen things. I want him to know that I will help him find happiness through others, even if it will take a lifetime to ever find one.

I really don't admire people that fast; if I don't think they're worth of my time, I won't even bother stop and look at that person in the eye—but this person, the guy I have known for a decade and a half now, just never fails taking my breath away. Every drawl of his is like bloody Chance Music to my ears.

It's not really me to suddenly become this love struck idiot, but what do you know?

* * *

><p><em>November 28, 2008<em>

It was his sixteenth birthday yesterday, and I gave him a pack of freshly-picked strawberries as a gift. Of course, I never told him it was me, or everyone would flip. So many people went out of their way to give him something nice, especially the girls. They were crowding him like he's some superstar while they offered those girly boxes at him. One girl even shoved a cake to his face—which made him really mad that he almost set the place on fire. Luckily, his bunny friend convinced him not to do so or they'll be expelled.

"_I__'__d __give __everything __to __be __expelled __in __this __hellhole,__" _was his only retort, and then he walked off, leaving his bunny boy friend struggling on his feet when all the presents were dumped on him.

Fortunately, I had the strawberries delivered in his room. I don't know if he ate it, though. I just hope he does. After all, I picked those strawberries myself. The least he could do to repay me from picking those manually was to eat it and be happy.

* * *

><p><em>December 31, 2008<em>

Tomorrow's the New Year, and I am so bored. Everyone's making such a fuss about the decorations in the dormitory, and I am so bored. The cafeteria was so full of ornaments and noodles, and I am so bored. My classmates started decorating their rooms, and I am so bored. Everyone's making so many cards to give to people, and I am so bored. Natsume doesn't even give a shit about New Year as he's just sitting there on a tree directly outside my laboratory, and I am so bored. I don't give a care as to why he's staring at me writing this because I'm too bored to ask.

I am hungry, and I am bored.

Lazy day, here I come.

* * *

><p><em>January 10, 2009<em>

So many things.

I don't even know where to freaking start.

First, after my **I ****am ****so ****bored **entry, Natsume suddenly stood up and went away. I thought he was already gone but then a knock on my door interrupted my musings. When I opened it, I was dumbfounded. It was him, with his crimson orbs, no-care demeanour and emotionless look—only now, he looked like he had some business with me.

"_The __strawberries, __it __was __you__…" _he suddenly said, hands holding my arm tightly and shook me lightly. There was a slight change in his drawl that signified something.

"_I __don__'__t __know __what __you__'__re __blathering __about,__" _I equalled his statement with mine, when in fact I was really feeling weird. Why in the name of crustaceans would he give so much fuss with a strawberry?

"_Hotaru__…" _he trailed off and suddenly walked away, leaving me in a hot mess.

What did he just call me?

"_What __did __you __just __call __me?__" _I called; he turned around and walked back. This guy is probably on crack or something.

"_I __never __forgot __about __you, __despite __what __you __might __think,__" _and, after almost a decade of waiting, he flashed me one of his rare smiles.

Something happened after that, but I don't want to think about it. All I want to remember was the torrent of emotions and the awkwardness of the situation that came with it. It was too surreal to be happening in real life, as if I had been dreaming all along. I don't know if I had been hoping for it to happen subconsciously, because honestly, I am far better on liking a person without him liking me back. Like—or love—is such a complicated feeling that I really want to evade for the rest of my existence, but it _surprisingly_ found me after years of hiding. As I felt it happen, I realized how deeply deprived I am of such emotion. It was nothing less than my thousand-crabs-and-ponta happiness. I don't know what happened to me that I suddenly melted under his touch and gave in completely. I never thought it would happen to me—and for the most part, it never crossed my mind to share it with him, of all people! It was just too fervid, too magical. I never would have imagined myself kiss Natsume Hyuuga with such passion.

Never in a million years.

"_I __have __never __said __this __to __anyone, __but __I __felt __that __you __are __the __only __girl __who __truly __understood __me __for __who __I __am. __Hotaru, __will __you __give __me __a __chance?__" _his eyes was pleading and…I don't even know what was going on anymore.

"_Are __you __on __crack? __What__'__s __going __on?__" _I was about to slam my door when he held me in his arms once again. Why does this keep on happening?

"_I __like __you __a __lot, __Hotaru. __I __know __you __like __me __too, __I __can __feel __it,__" _and then he looked at me with a heavy intensity, as if he could see through me and read whatever was on my mind.

I seriously don't know what was happening, mainly because it wasn't him to act like that. He looked serious, but it could be that he only wants something from me so he did it. Part of me wanted to believe in him, but I couldn't be so sure of whatever was his motive. Maybe I'm being a little too judgmental and probably he was saying the truth about how he feels about me.

I honestly don't know what to think anymore.

"_Sure,__" _even I was shocked when that came out of my mouth. His eyes widened for a fleeting moment and immediately hugged me. I was too confused to hug him back, but I held on to him all the same.

"_Thank __you, __Hotaru. __I __will __never __break __your __heart, __I __promise,__" _with this, I mentally told myself to hold on to what he said.

This was so damn confusing. I don't know what happened to him, but now, I'm his girlfriend—if you put it that way. I do think this is a little too disadvantaging for me, because I just agreed without even weighing the possibilities. But then, it was my heart taking over my head, so I just hope he won't break my heart on the way.

It's just the second week of January and I'm already confused with where I'm going with this life.

* * *

><p><em>March 17, 2009<em>

These past few weeks have been heaven for me and it's all thanks to Natsume. It had been three months since we started going out and I could say my feelings for him have grown tenfold. He'd often treat me to some of the trendiest restaurants, give me presents, surprise me in the middle of the corridor, carry my books for me, and all others. I'd say he kinda spoiled the heck out of me, but who cares?

Most of my classmates were flabbergasted when they first saw us holding hands on the way to our homeroom, especially his bunny-boy friend, but we never gave a damn. Who cares about what they think? It's what we feel for each other that matters. I'm happy with whatever is happening with my life and I won't let anyone get in the way of our relationship.

Natsume, if you ever have the chance to read this, I love you more than I've ever loved anyone aside from myself.

* * *

><p><em>March 19, 2009<em>

Today, we went boating with the others, but Natsume really went his way this time, giving me whatever I asked him for. Maybe this one's a little bit too overrated, but I feel like the happiest girl in the world.

* * *

><p><em>March 29, 2009<em>

**Bucket List**

• Travel around the world with Natsume

• Graduate and be successful

• Eat as much crabs as I could

• Build my home with Natsume

• Earn money

• Earn many money

• Become rich and famous

• Write a book about my life and/or snippets of it

• Earn lots of money enough to buy all crabs in the world

• Have a dog

• Build something worthwhile

• Make Natsume happy all the time

• Ride a gondola

• Discover the dark deeds of the Academy

• Find genuine joy in life

• Become a successful photographer

• Reunite with my best friend

• Rest under the shade of a Sakura tree with Natsume

• Learn Mandarin, French and Italian—just so I could talk to my clients without interpreters. ;)

• Learn to sing—so I could do a duet with Natsume

_…this list could go on and on and on…_

* * *

><p><em>Imai, whatever we did during the past few months was part of a dare. Sorry.<em>

_- NH_

* * *

><p><em>April 1, 2009<em>

It's April Fools' Day, and I've never been fooled for so long in my life.

Earlier today, I went to that stupid raven-haired bastard's room with such happiness. So he greeted me with a disgustingly torrid kiss which I so-happily returned with the same freaking intensity, not knowing what his plan for the day was. I never thought he would shag the brains out of me—forgive me for the word; I am just so fucking pissed at myself for ever giving in to the stupid lust and whatever you may want to call it. After that pretty tiresome adventure which I never thought I would most definitely regret for the rest of my life, I woke up to the absence of his damn body beside me on the bed, and then I saw a very crumpled paper that made me break whatever I could see inside his room (see above). I know for sure he will sue me for all those damage I have done but nothing could ever compare to what he did to me. He abused me, for chrissakes! He used me for his own pleasure and then left me hanging over empty words and whatnot. I feel like I could just kill everyone I see and get it over with. Never, in my whole fucking life would I ever think that he would do that. The boy I grew up with was very, _very_ different from the one who agreed on a stupid dare just to bed girls and gain more popularity. But most of all, I never thought that he would do that to me—I know we haven't talked for so long since we got inside the Academy but at least he could've given me just a little bit of respect to spare. I don't know why he chose me, of all people, to fuck with—or maybe it gave him a whole lot of bragging rights just to know that he shagged **the** Heartless, Untouchable Queen of the Academy.

Why did I have to give in? Why did I have to believe in the wrong person?

* * *

><p><em>April 3, 2009<em>

You douchebag,

This is a fuck you  
>for the love that I gave<br>and the love you neglected.

A middle finger to everything I can remember  
>you said you'd do but did not.<p>

A middle finger for breaking my heart  
>and still not letting the two halves go out of your hand.<p>

* * *

><p><em>April 5, 2009<em>

RUKA NOGI WILL BORROW THIS. HE PAID ME HIS WHOLE YEAR ALLOWANCE. I AM GOING TO BE RICH.

* * *

><p><em>Imai-san, <em>

_I only wanted to read the first page. Thank you for lending me your precious diary. I didn't bother reading the others because I know it's not really my business to know anything more of you. :) I'll have the lifetime supply of crabs delivered on your door every other day. Thank you, once again._

_Ruka_

* * *

><p><em>April 6, 2009<em>

A whole bag of crabs greeted me on the way out. This notebook was with it. See that note pasted above? That was inserted in here, too. And I have noticed that the first page of this diary has been tampered with. A part of it was emphasized—if you don't believe me, go see for yourself—and it got me thinking…who in their right mind would ever—

Holy crapballs.

_HOW TO MAKE ME LOVE YOU? GIVE ME A LIFETIME SUPPLY OF CRABS AND WE CAN TALK ABOUT THE MARRIAGE LATER ON._

* * *

><p><em>October 25, 2009<em>

Ruka confessed his love to me.

Way to celebrate my sixteenth birthday.

I can't say I haven't seen this coming. Ever since my last entry, he has been sending me too many crabs with messages in them. I've always told him not to waste his time because even after everything, Natsume is still my heart's desire, but he would never budge.

I don't know what to do.

* * *

><p><em>Hotaru, <em>

_I know it's hard. I know you still haven't given up on my best friend, and I can accept that. Trust me, I know how it feels. I know exactly how it feels to cry in the shower so no one could hear your sobs. For everything to hurt so bad you just want it all to end, I know exactly how it feels. You may say I am being an idiot, but I liked you for so long now, Hotaru. When they did the dare, I really got angry at Natsume for doing it to you, but I can't stop him no matter what I do because he will just get mad at me and desert me. I am tired of people ignoring me. Hotaru, I know he's still the one occupying that special space in your heart, but please give me one chance. I only need one chance for you to know that I am not kidding like you think. I won't abandon you like what Natsume did, I won't give out empty promises, I won't do all those sweet things if I don't mean it. _

_I love you, Hotaru._

_Ruka_

* * *

><p><em>November 27, 2009<em>

_Nogi,_

_I understand what you are saying, but I'm sorry. As much as I would like to use it to my advantage, I don't want to abuse your feelings toward me. No one will ever complete me again, and no one will ever make me feel comfortable in my own skin anymore. Even though you say that you can replace him in my life, you just can't. I like you, but I love him more. That's just all there is to it._

_Imai_

* * *

><p><em><strong>May 15, 2010<strong>_

I am back—I was writing the entry for today at the front page just because. Don't ask me why. So here I am with the last entry for this chapter of my life. It wasn't that good of a chapter, in fact, I could classify it as something too dramatic for my liking. But that's life, I suppose. It's never going to go the way we want it, but we still accept it all the same—simply because that's the only thing available, duh.

Thank you for reading, and before I drift off someplace nice and non-too-emotional, I'll leave you with this freeverse poem someone made me a couple of months ago—on November 28, 2009, to be exact. I just hope that as I leave this here, I won't be haunted by the melodramatic memories that come with it anymore.

_**Hotaru,**_

**_From _****_the _****_moment _****_I _****_met _****_you _****_I _****_couldn_****_'_****_t _****_stop _****_smiling._**

**_It _****_all _****_started _****_when _****_you _****_came _****_along _****_and _****_blew _****_me _****_away._**

**_I _****_used _****_to _****_look _****_over _****_your _****_shoulder _****_for _****_answers, _****_or _****_a _****_glimpse _****_of _****_your very rare _****_smile._**

**_Nothing _****_ever _****_seemed _****_to _****_come _****_easy _****_for _****_us._**

**_I _****_was _****_always _****_ignored, _****_and _****_you _****_were _****_always _****_shy._**

**_I _****_still _****_have _****_the _****_note you _****_wrote _****_me._**

**"****_I _****_like _****_you, _****_but _****_I _****_love _****_him _****_more._****_"_**

**_Those _****_first _****_three _****_words _****_were _****_all _****_I _****_ever _****_wanted, _****_the _****_last _****_five _****_were _****_exactly _****_what _****_I _****_was _****_afraid _****_of._**

_**We ****never ****became ****an ****item, ****but ****just ****seeing ****you ****happy ****is ****what brings the smile back on my face****.**_

_**I ****have ****your ****pictures ****in ****my ****pillow,****a ****sight ****to ****behold.**_

**_I _****_look _****_at _****_it, _****_from _****_time _****_to _****_time, _****_just _****_to _****_let _****_my _****_heart _****_know _****_that _****_you_****_'_****_re _****_gone._**

**_I _****_love _****_you, _****_my firefly_****_. _****_Farewell._**

**_NR_**

* * *

><p><em>"And that's the thing about people who mean everything they say. They think everyone else does too."<em>

_Fin._

* * *

><p><em>I don't know what I just did. I inserted a <strong>hell lot<strong> of dry humor and I don't even know if you guys get it or what._

_Reviews? I need to know what you think about this. Thank you!_

_Ria x_


	3. Blue Roses

Inspired by **MysticBlood**'s Tumblr URL, _bluerosesformylove_. Hi Bianca—I don't know if you still check your FFn account or you've completely forgotten about it or if you do read GA fics but here you go. =)

Please take note that this one-shot is purely random and the author herself is currently in this awkward position of telling you this because of the insistent seduction of a blank document hanging around the desktop and the persistence of a plot bunny—which happens rarely, mind you.

* * *

><p><strong>Blue Roses<strong>

_"What she wants is just impossible, unattainable. It was a fantasy, she knew, but she wanted it all the same."_

* * *

><p>She was introduced to the world of blooming flowers at such a young age.<p>

She was alone, but she was never lonely. She knew many people, but she only had few friends. Her family was never part of the upper-class and she never knew of flowers until she learned about it in school. Ever since she was a kid, flowers seemed to be her stress-reliever. She could look at it outside her window all day long and not care about a single problem in the world. She has always been adamant on having a flower box around the house, as it calms her system. But then, poor as they are, they could only afford a bush of rose outside her window.

She always took care of the said bush and it grew well under her green thumb. She felt like she was happier with the company of her plants than those people she once called her friends. She would never let anyone dare touch it for fear of its death. After a few months of delicate growth, a red, healthy rose bloomed.

She was happy.

* * *

><p>Her eighteenth birthday came—the most awaited debut. It was the age where girls would rather go to parties than study, read magazines over books, and fail rather than be real; technically, the age of rebellion. She never was one of them. She became a beautiful girl, and suitors have always been lined up outside their door. They present her heaps of gifts, mostly her favorite chrysanthemums and roses. Their house was adorned with different colors and kinds of flowers anyone could ever have.<p>

One day, she came across a newspaper clipping about her most favorite thing in the world.

_Flowers._

_One of the most beautiful things ever showered by God upon men. Over the years, flowers have been known to signify certain interpretations and emotions. It is said that if you offer flowers, you do not just send its perfect bloom and scent, but you also express a message from your heart that even words dare not describe. Flowers create such pleasant and wondrous feeling to whoever you give it to. Between the female and male population worldwide, a glaringly obvious survey result shows that the latter are the ones who actually abuse the splendidness of flowers as a gift to women. However touching it may seem for ladies to receive a bouquet of roses, one just cannot shrug off the fact that the color of a flower depicts a multi-faceted interpretations as well._

_For example, you cannot just give someone a black rose on a lovely wedding, can you?_

_Speaking of such, roses are probably one of the most overused yet tragically underestimated flowers in all of history. It is also one of the few flowers with varying colors—which corresponds to its own meaning, of course._

_**Red roses** are a classic and popular choice since their message shows an unmistakable expression of love. The color itself symbolizes eternal romance and passion. **White roses**, on the other hand, symbolizes innocence and purity—just the color of this rose signifies your pure intentions as you offer this rose to somebody special. Meanwhile, there are also variations in the shade of a **pink rose **though all hues generally send off a message of sweetness and elegance**_—light _**_ones signify happiness and admiration while **dark** ones symbolize appreciation or thankfulness. **Peach roses** express sympathy and sincerity, **orange roses **signify deep desire and enthusiasm as this color is the color of warmth and energy. Offering **lavender roses** symbolizes your adoration and enchantment for that person while **black roses **(**dark red roses**) signify new beginnings or rebirth. However, there is one special rose which has been garnering too much attention these past few months, and that is the **blue rose**. These kinds of roses only exist in our imagination_—and though people try their hardest to replicate the said color by means of dyeing or genetically altering them_—there is no argument when we say that this rose symbolizes impossibility and unattainability. ____

As soon as she lifted her eyes from the clipping, she immediately scanned her surroundings for any sign of a blue rose. And that was when she realized that it was exactly what she needed.

She wanted a man who could offer her a blue rose, may it be dyed, genetically engineered or **whatever**. She wanted to defy the millions of impossibilities shrouding the said rose_—_she wanted to attain it. And hopefully, she could find the right man who will bring those to her.

The thought of it made her happy.

* * *

><p>She just turned 21. She's not getting any younger. Men have surrendered on courting her, as she was asking for so many things<em>—<em>impossible ones at that. It has been three years since she made up her mind about marrying the man who can bring her a blue rose, it's been so long.

Three.

Long.

Years.

She waited for three years, but no one brought her a single rose with a blue hue.

Her parents encouraged her so many times to just give up and marry the first man to ever set foot inside their humble abode, but she was unyielding. She knew there was someone out there who will make her wishes come true. She could feel it inside her. She hated to admit it, but she thought of giving up so many times before, though whenever she does, a spark inside her always counterattacks her judgment, thus, making her stick to her decision. What she wants is just impossible, unattainable. It was a fantasy, she knew, but she wanted it all the same.

Her friends are now married, and, even if they don't say it out loud, she could sense their pitiful stares behind her back. They'd tell her to give up, and she'd tell them to get lost. She does not need them, nor their fake words of comfort.

She will wait for him to come_—_no matter when_—_and she will welcome him with open arms.

And together, they'll be happy.

* * *

><p>27. The number is almost past the calendar now. She wants to give up and take heed to her peers and parents' words.<p>

"Mikan, you're not getting younger, and so are we. Who will take care of you when we depart from this world?" she was too fed up of all these things. She wanted to stand firm with her decision, but they were also right. She _is_ of age to get married and build her own home, but here she is, still depending on her parents.

It was becoming a little bit embarrassing.

So, with a determined look on her face, she opened the door and took a deep breath. She sat on their flower box which made her vaguely remember the childhood she never really enjoyed so much. Her teenage years, all these flashed like a fast-forward video inside her head. Her memories led her to her current situation, and then she realized.

_'Maybe I have let so many opportunities pass by me. It's either I said no too early, or yes too late. Maybe it's not too late to change my outlook today.'_

She was too busy pondering over this that she almost got hit by an arrow with a note and_—_brace yourself_—_a _blue rose _tied on it. Her eyes caught a man with raven hair hiding behind the trees, his failed stealth amusing her all the more.

_It was him, it had to be him._

She gingerly got it from where it perfectly landed on and peeled the note off instinctively, being very careful not to destroy the blue rose.

_**Blue roses for my love, my one and only love. **_

**_They tell me there are many fish in the sea,_**

**_When really, you're the only one I see._**

**_You know me very well, my love,_**

**_My one and only love._**

**_There are many roses in your garden,_**

**_Please tell your heart not to harden._**

**_Accept my rose, my love,_**

**_My one and only love._**

**_Please do not throw these away,_**

**_Even though its color is really that way._**

**_Accept my presents, my love,_**

**_My one and only love._**

**_Please don't tear my feelings apart,_**

**_And let it inside your heart._**

Her watery eyes drifted away from the note to the rose with a weird hue. She felt like a thousand boulders were lifted off her. Like she could breathe again. It was actually a wonderful feeling, to love and be loved_, _to feel wanted by someone. And as she closed the door, she knew that the next time she'll open it, the raven-haired man will appear again, if not knocking on her doorstep, then to her heart he will. He'll love her and will make her realize that it was actually worth all the wait.

They will be happy in each other's arms and will love each other till the blue rose dies_._

_But plastic roses do not have the capability to wilt._

* * *

><p><strong>End<strong>

_I have a thing for flowers, actually. Though I would rather choose pink roses than blue ones. :)_

_Reviews?_

_Ria x_


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